For April

It's kind of a funny day for me. My older brother got engaged last night and my best friend (who was also my maid of honor) is getting married today.

I've gotten used to the idea of my brother getting hitched since he's been dating his fiance for three years and they've been talking about getting married for the last year. He was the first of my parents' five kids to begin a serious relationship (I was the second). He even expected to be engaged and married before I was, but he was not as prepared to support two people. But now it's his turn, and there will be a wedding in Texas (where she is from) next year. And I'm very happy for them. While change is always a weird experience (especially when I am directly involved), I want my family to be happy and I think everyone deserves to find lasting love. It just happens for some people sooner than others.

Which brings me to my best friend's story. Even she thought she would be married before me. It was certain three years ago. She was preparing to marry the boy she had dated during and then again after high school. They'd been together four years and she was absolutely sure she was ready to marry him. But a lot of us around her were not so sure. I call him a boy, because that's exactly what he was at that time. He was still so very immature, yet she is one of the most mature women I have ever known. She has always been driven and determined to accomplish her goals. At twenty-four years of age, she already has her Master's in social work. She just seemed decades ahead of her fiance and he couldn't bring himself to treat her like the treasure we all knew she was. It didn't feel right to any of us. Then a few months before the wedding, in the midst of planning, she broke it off. It hurt to see her so heartbroken, but I was happy that she had come to the realization that she deserved someone better, someone who truly loved her with all of his being.

And then she was one of the single girls. For the next few years, we were absolutely inseparable. She was still longing to be married, but knew it wasn't the right season and she should wait. In that season, she became the icon of the single woman to me and the epitome of purity. I just couldn't imagine her with anyone (it isn't as mean as it sounds, it's just where she was in my eyes at the time). As she was one of the older ones of our group, everyone was always anticipating for her to meet a guy (the guy) and start dating again. I think it came as a surprise when I met and began dating my husband (being one of the younger ones, I don't think anyone was expecting that to happen as soon as it did). But she was there for me. And I'm sure it was difficult, with me being younger and her wanting so much to be married and start a family. Yet she helped me above and beyond what I asked of her and watched me be happy while her own happiness was prolonged.

Two months later, she met an amazing guy on the dating website she had joined a while before. And he was truly amazing. He had all of the qualities she was searching for: a genuine and mature Christian, kind, considerate, smart,  had a stable job, lots of common interests, plus a lot more that she knows about him that I don't! The chemistry was strong and her excitement uncontainable. And this continued over the next few months. I was worried something would happen and she would be disappointed, as had occurred before in similar situations. But it never did. They arranged to meet face to face in Seattle in February (since he was from California) and I went with her and her mother (to be protective and make sure he was all he said he was). It was a fun few days and by the time we left for the Tri-Cities, she was sure he was the one (and he was just as sure).

I moved away, knowing that they were already discussing engagement and marriage. But being away, I didn't hear much more than that. She texted me a few months ago saying they discovered his mom had aggressive cancer and was headed to San Francisco to be with him and his mom. When they were told his mom had six months to live, they decided to move forward with the wedding so that she could be there for it and so my friend could help take care of her. It would be a simple, small wedding and they would have a bigger one next year. My friend even asked me to fly to California and be her matron of honor; although I wanted to with all of my heart, my husband couldn't get the time off and we didn't have the finances (because of our recent trip home). So she asked another of our friends to stand with her. The wedding began an hour ago and I couldn't be happier. It was all very sudden but I am so glad she is with the man of her dreams. I wish I could have been there for her, but I definitely will be next year (and for my brother on his day as well).

As an end note, here's some interesting trivia. My best friend, my brother, and I all met our significant others on the internet. My husband is also missing his best friend's wedding this summer. And it seems everyone else's relationships started snowballing after I got engaged to my husband ;)