Truth of the Trolls

I'm going to get on my soapbox for a moment. I think I have the right to do so on my own blog, yes? Even though I would love to say this stuff to many, many people on social networking sites I happen to be a part of, I am much too nice (or just polite) to do so. Instead of saying it to their--well, profiles--I will say it to the world, because the world obviously needs it.

Stop flaunting your atrocious, incorrect grammar on the internet. There, I said it. I am nauseated to see, day after day, such irresponsible use of the English language. I understand not everyone can afford a college education, but if you would at least appropriate what you were taught in high school (as far as you made it in high school, anyway), we would all be able to get the general idea you are trying to relate. Posting that you are "g3ttin wurkkkkkk dunnnn" only assures me that you are either immature or an idiot. It's bad enough to see kids in middle school write like that (they should still know better), but it is absolutely revolting to see from someone of graduating age.

I don't care that you think you are a "thug", "cuteeee", or genius. You were forced to sit through hours of English for a reason; no matter how much you  may have hated it, something had to have stuck with you. Typing in ALL CAPITALS, does not make you awesome, extreme, or unique--it just gives a headache to everyone who has to read your writing.

Speaking of "your", something that makes me inwardly cringe the most is the lack of grasp a good percentage of the population seems to have on the usage of this word, or the spelling it gets confused with. Over and over you are corrected by internet grammar Nazis, and still you continue your ridiculous behavior. I'm going to play that old and tired record, just to get things straight. "Your" is strictly a possessive term. One does not say "your uneducated"; this implies that "uneducated" belongs to you (however much that term applies to you, one cannot possess an adjective). The informed reader obviously expects a noun to follow, for example "your uneducated son, your uneducated possum", etc. If a noun is not given, the "sentence" is a train wreck. One also cannot say "you're computer". "You're" is a shortened version of "you are"; once expanded, the statement reads "you are computer". This may make sense to a caveman, but a reader would assume that the writer does not understand English well. "Your" should be used here, because it says that the computer belongs to you.

I have the same issue with the misuse of "there/their/they're" and "write/right" and many more homophones that most people confuse, but that last English lesson wore me out. If you are unfamiliar with the usage of these words, see a dictionary.

I am not so naive to think that heinous spelling on the internet will halt because I write a silly blog post. It does, however, make me feel better to write my irritation out. Some readers (if they are diligent) will realize that is where most of my posts stem from: emotions over certain topics. I'm not sure how normal people deal with these things, but I prefer to write them out.

Yes, I misspell things myself occasionally. To my horror, I've come across things I've written that have been posted on other websites in which I have spelled a word or two incorrectly (or used the wrong word). But whenever I write something, I tend to be very meticulous about my spelling and grammar. I run spell check several times and read over it plenty before I post. That is why I'm surprised when things are missed. It seems to happen more often when I write while I am tired (as is happening now) and I will constantly misspell silly things. I correct them when I catch them, but it desensitizes me to a lot of the errors. I just want the reader to know I am not preaching what I do not practice myself.

I was actually thinking about this post in bed last night, but was almost asleep and didn't want to get up to write it. It was a lot angrier and meaner than this one (and some of the points I thought about were so good, I may include them later if I think of them, mean or not). But name-calling does not a case make, however much certain bad spellers anger me. (I do find it entertaining that when internet trolls are losing an argument, they begin to correct the grammar of the one they are trolling. They usually win.) I'm glad I remembered the main points. (You should also know that a lot of the time when I'm writing blog posts, I think in a British accent. It helps me come up with sentences that sound more intelligent than the original basis of the idea.)

Enough revelations into my sleepy brain. This is your self-proclaimed grammar Nazi, getting off her soapbox. Gute Nacht!