The Complexity of Love, Part II

I don't know how many installments of this I will write; they may be infinite, knowing that the discourse on such an obviously complex topic as love could go on forever. I will try to keep these organized by relevance, but when I ramble, you never know what will happen.

Romance. It can get a teenage, adult, or middle-aged woman flat on her back if performed with the correct timing, sincerity, and care. Sometimes, it's sad how simple it is. But it isn't some magic button or memorized set of motions a man can activate over and over to get his way; it is brought about by a thoughtful application and expression of love.

Girls are raised to crave it, and boys are raised struggling to grasp the full concept of it. If you ask a female what romance looks like, there's a good chance she'll giggle and say, "It's so obvious!" But it isn't, especially to the male population. In all honesty, while there are some general performances of romance that translate to all women, romance should be tailored to that special lady. What works for some women may not work for others.

Romance is part of the fire and mystery of marriage. (I do mean to say fire. It's referred to often as a spark, but that baby should be roaring. I don't care how old you are or how long you've been married-a "spark" isn't enough to sustain the relationship.)

Romance could pop up at any second, or you may spend your day planning it out. And it isn't only women who desire it--men enjoy loving expressions just as much. Maybe not to the same degree. But as it is with everything in relationship, there must be a give and take for romance as well.

Some women, through rejection or bad relationship experiences, decide they don't need romance anymore. They say they are too good for any hapless attempt from a man, or too strong to need one. There is a myth that strong people don't need anything--but the appearance of strength does not mean you are above basic human needs.

One of those needs built into us from the moment we are born is the need for love, the need to be pursued, the need to be wooed and courted. A main factor of romance is bringing the significant other to the understanding that they are wanted by you, and you desire them enough to make an effort to communicate it.

Romance is an ever-changing, every-growing, always flowing concept. You can't develop a list of concrete tactics to extract affection from your sweetheart for the next fifty years; you've got to try new ideas, new approaches, be creative. It's never a set thing, and it's always fun to surprise the love of your life from a different angle.